they're having ANOTHER PARTY.

i want to scream. posted at 10:52 PM |  

slept at my mom's the last 2 nights...i was so tired. i actually meant to come back to my place yesterday, but then i decided sleep was more important...

anyway, i was just filling out my invoice for work, and i realized i only worked about 14 days this month. and that includes a reasonable amount of fudging/exaggeration. so...i won't be making much this month. crap. posted at 5:58 PM |  

i'll spare you the details, but i finally fell asleep sometime between 5:30 and 6. i feel like i'm the hungover one right now... posted at 11:58 AM |  

the morons left their bathroom fan on. it's been on for 30 minutes now. and i can't go sleep in the other room because they are all in there talking.

the only good thing to come out of all this tonight is that i got a lot of work done. figured i can't sleep anyway with all this noise, might as well be productive while i'm up.

*sigh*...life sucks. posted at 3:59 AM |  

i apologize for all of my recent posts being on THE SAME SUBJECT, but i just want to cry right now. i don't feel like banging on the ceiling. i don't feel like going up there and knocking on their door for 5 minutes while they pretend to not hear me. i'm tired of randomly slamming doors and kicking objects just to get out whatever aggression i'm feeling inside. i don't want to talk to them, and i don't want to yell at them. i just want them gone. i want peace and quiet. i want to be able to sleep through the night.

IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR? posted at 1:58 AM |  

they're having another party upstairs! another one! that's 4 times this week. yes, that's right. they've had 4 parties in 7 days. berkeley students.

i find it hard to believe that no one else has complained. i think the unit above them is empty right now...i hope not for long...i met this one girl who came to look at it, and i felt like warning her. but it would be nice if i had someone else to back me up. posted at 12:15 AM |  

so i wrote a letter to the building management complaining about the noise. i feel better now. i honestly wouldn't have done it if not for what happened last night. the way i see it, they had a choice. after i went up there and complained, they could have gotten quieter, or they could have continued to be loud. they chose the latter.

bad decision. posted at 3:02 PM |  

i just went up and yelled at upstairs guy. i had no intention of yelling when i went up there, just thought...ok, it's 2 am, it's a reasonable time for me to nicely ask them to be quiet without coming across as a total bitch. but i went up and knocked several times, and then i heard someone say "quiet down - shhh - don't answer it" - and that did it. i got so fucking pissed. i yelled at their door that i heard them say that. so then the guy opens the door and everyone's all quiet and shit...and he says "oh, sorry i didn't realize we were being loud" - BULLSHIT.

i probably woke up some neighbors because i just lost it when he said that. he has some nerve...seriously, it was obvious that he was lying. then when i came back down, they started stomping around really loud. and i can still hear them now - loud as they were before i went up there. assholes.

to think, i was trying to be nice to them...well, no more of that. they don't like me banging on the ceiling? too bad, i'm going to bang every chance i get from now on. in fact, i think i may go bang on it right now. not like i can sleep anyway. posted at 2:01 AM |  

the guys upstairs are being so loud...i just want to scream.

aaarrrrrrggggghhhh.

they make me miserable. they really do. i couldn't fall asleep until 5 am last night. and last week was pretty damn bad. and sunday night they were insanely loud like they are now.

i'm trying to be understanding of the fact that they are college kids and they want to have fun and party every night. but then why did they have to move into this quiet northside building? can't they...i don't know, join a frat? live southside? rent a house instead?

and how are they even passing their classes given the amount of partying they've been doing lately? this was unheard of when i was in school here. no one i knew had time to party this often...fucking ridiculous. posted at 11:04 PM |  

been wanting to blog more, but work has been keeping me really busy. deadline coming up next week. i feel like i'm in school again...

anyway, like i said, the wedding was really boring. it was just way, way, way too religious for me. cheezily religious, really. however, it was the first christian wedding i have been to, so maybe they're all like that. i don't know.

and the bride didn't meet the guy at work, she met him online. in fact, i don't really think they've spent that much time together. they didn't kiss, not even once, at the ceremony or the reception. they didn't even do the "first dance" thing. it was odd. i mean, i know she's really shy about things like that, so i shouldn't be surprised. but....this part of me wonders if she'd ever kissed him. and i really doubt that she'd so much as made out with him. maybe i'm wrong...i hope i'm wrong...but knowing her, it's a definite possibility.

the whole thing is just weird to me. i can't imagine doing that, even if i had really traditional parents like hers.

oh, and the wedding itself was just really blah - hardly any decorations, bad food, not many people (compared to other indian weddings anyway). and i know she and her family has a lot of money, so i don't see why they wouldn't go all out...

this other girl from college had it even worse - an arranged marriage to a guy who lives in india, who she has only seen twice. blows my mind that someone born and raised here would even agree to that. i mean, i can understand having family set you up with someone in the same area (or at least the same country!), and perhaps dating them for a month or so, and then getting engaged or whatever. a lot of that goes on. but, this seems rather extreme to me. 15-20 years ago, sure. but now? and with parents who have been living in the US for 30-40 years? i just can't imagine being in that situation...i mean, of course, my parents are pretty frustrated that i can't seem to "find a boy" by myself, but i just don't see them resorting to something like that. nor would i allow it to happen.

anyway...so compared to these girls, i'm pretty happy being single right now. posted at 2:21 PM |  

the wedding was extremely boring. but the good news is, i left early enough to catch the last half of the cal game! and they actually came back and won the thing right when i was starting to lose hope! i don't think i have ever seen our coach so happy and excited - he generally doesn't show much emotion at all, so to see him jumping around and everything...it was nice.

anyway, need to get some work done tonight...i'm so far behind... posted at 7:45 PM |  

waiting for a package...specifically, the wedding present, which i ordered online a couple weeks ago thinking that was plenty of time. damn thing still hasn't gotten here. i haven't even taken a shower today because i'm worried that i'll miss the UPS guy...

i guess i may have to drop off the present some time after the wedding. but there's 2 hours of my life gone... posted at 3:13 PM |  

the person who was picking up the tickets ended up meeting me very close to where i live. so that was nice.

i'd so rather go to the game than to the wedding...is that sad? i'm just so sick of weddings by this point... posted at 2:28 PM |  

so i'm trying to sell my football tickets for this weekend, and i'm really annoyed with these people who want to buy them...like, i'm already selling the tickets at well below face value, but on top of that, they want to make me meet them at a place of their choosing! if anything, they should come to my place if they want the damn tickets, or ask me where i can meet them. this one girl even gave me a specific time and intersection, without giving me any choice! i had to email back and request another time...so ridiculous...she still wants me to go to that same intersection - which is not at all convenient for me...

am i wrong for being annoyed? i mean, at the very least, it should be a time and place that is mutually acceptable, right? some sort of middle-ground? posted at 7:50 PM |  

i'm constantly feeling like i don't have time for anything these days...i try so hard to work a minimum of 6-7 hours a day, but i hardly ever do. it's a struggle to put in 4 or 5 hours somedays, and i still feel like i don't have time for anything else - cleaning, errands, etc. even blogging. as i type this, i know i should be doing work instead...

part of the problem is my increasingly screwed up sleep schedule. i didn't fall asleep until about 4:30 last night - and i had to go to another room to do that. i have no idea what was going on upstairs, but when i was semi-asleep for a few minutes (before i went to sleep somewhere else), i had a dream that he was building something...thought i was hearing a lot of hammering in my sleep. but no, it wasn't hammering. just him moving around in his room. for over 2 hours straight...

so anyway, i've been sleeping in too much. and other than getting to a late start in the morning, i just can't concentrate half the time. i'm starting to not like my work. i know, i liked it earlier. but now...not so much. it's alright sometimes, but this week...i've been feeling really tired of it. it's hard to explain. i like it in small doses. not full time. but i need to work full time so i can get paid the full time amount!

and on that note, i should go get some more work done... posted at 11:05 PM |  

i know every family has their secrets...but sometimes i feel like there are waaaaaaay too many in my family. lately, more and more relatives have been telling me things - things that were kept from me before because they thought i was too young or whatever - and i just don't know how to react when i find out. part of me feels like "why are you telling me this now?" and another part of me wonders whether or not this new info is even correct, or if it's the result of much exaggeration as it traveled through the grapevine...either way, it's annoying. i wonder if it's better to not know at all...and on the other hand, i wonder what else has been kept from me...drives me nuts. posted at 7:33 PM |  

cal played like crap today. and lost. two losses in a row! so depressing...

*reminding myself of the 1-10 year*

oh well. we're rebuilding. yeah...that's it. posted at 4:43 PM |  

decided to sleep at my mom's place last night, just to be on the safe side. and it worked - i got over 6 hours of sleep. probably 2-3 more hours than i would have gotten had i stayed at my place...

anyway, i had to go to the oakland office today. i think i like this office best. it's right by the lake...totally dead neighborhood though. i don't really go to downtown oakland much (ok, at all)...but i expected to see more people walking around - especially when i arrived at 8:45 in the morning. you'd think that other people would be reaching work right around then...but no, it was pretty empty.

i spoke during the meeting this time. this is good, i'm improving...i got a lot of compliments on my work too, so that was nice. and i feel better about the lesson. we did a lot of rearranging and editing and stuff. i have to remind myself that all this will be field-tested and revised...so rather than my gut telling me that kids won't understand something, i'll wait for the field testing to see how they actually do...

i got a call from sean during the meeting - i keep my phone off though. it feels strange when he calls out of the blue for no reason, and then i never hear from him again. i mean, when i got his message, i called him back and left a message for him. but i don't think he'll call back. he never does. and i shouldn't care whether or not he does. so my point is...he shouldn't have called in the first place, damn it. posted at 5:04 PM |  

crap - looks like i have a 9 AM meeting on friday...considering i've been going to sleep at 3:30 every night this week, that'll be tough.

i need to get some more work done before then. i was so tired and out of it yesterday, didn't do much of anything... posted at 11:58 AM |  

anyone have recommendations on good places to travel in india? other than rajasthan and kerala, because everyone's been there already. and i went to bangalore and mysore last time, so i don't want to go there again (though i'm open to going to other places in karnataka). we're basically thinking east or southeast. if there's anything worth seeing there. i really have no idea, and searching on the internet is driving me nuts. partially because 99% of the websites are trying to sell tour packages (not really objective in their descriptions) and partially because my geography is bad and i don't know where all these places are located.

anyway, i *think* i have a few indian readers, so comment away. posted at 7:00 PM |  

sometimes i feel like upstairs guy waits until i go to bed, then intentionally starts making a lot of noise after that point. i realize it's probably all in my head, and that he's probably not as evil as i make him out to be, but that's just how i feel at night when i can't sleep.

and i find it suspicious that he sometimes turns on the water in both the bathroom sink AND the tub, at the same time. what on earth is he doing (if not intentionally trying to annoy me)??? posted at 12:36 PM |  

my neck's feeling much better today. not 100%, but it's bearable. and i can look to the left now. so that's a good sign.

anyway, i should probably try to go to bed now before upstairs guy starts making noise. sometimes i debate over whether it's just better to stay up. i don't know. i hate sleeping in so late in the morning...especially now that my manager is back because she tends to email me around 9-ish. it looks kind weird that i don't reply until noon... posted at 2:07 AM |  

well, apparently my "good feeling" about the game meant nothing. just me getting my hopes up...actually, we should have won - damn that fake punt! and a couple of penalties at really, really bad times. those are the worst. but, maurice drew is really good - i can admit that. insanely fast.

you know what bugs me about our qb? i always see him smiling after he fucks up. you shouldn't be smiling - you should be hitting yourself on the head! at least pretend to be mad at yourself...it's just annoying to see a goofy grin on your face after you throw a really bad pass. especially in a close game or during crucial third downs. i mean, i'm glad you're having so much fun and all, but some of us actually care about the outcome of the game.

anyway. my neck still hurts a lot. i'm hoping that the pain will go down tomorrow...i can't really move around much feeling like this. posted at 12:52 AM |  

i was determined not to sleep in too much this morning...but, instead i just ended up hitting the snooze button about a million times...then, when i was finally attempting to get out of bed, i hurt my neck. i can't look to the left right now. nice, huh?

anyway...i hope it doesn't interfere with my tv-watching. important game this afternoon. for the past few weeks, i thought we were most likely going to lose this one, but now i think we'll win it. for no real reason - just a feeling. we'll see.

go bears! posted at 12:36 PM |  

my energy level's been really low these past few days...i've hardly gotten any work done. going hiking on tuesday was probably not a great idea in retrospect. wore me out...

i'm not all that happy with work right now either. it's hard to put everything together when all i can think is "this sucks..." or "this is terrible..." or something along those lines. i wanted to have everything done this week, but i'm finding it hard to make myself do things that i'm 90% sure are going to just be taken out later. i hate feeling like i'm doing all this work for no reason...hopefully this isn't normally how things go. i mean, i'm assuming that my manager going on vacation for 2 weeks has made things worse than they normally should be. i'll feel better when she comes back next week and i can go over things with her... posted at 11:46 PM |  

listening to the finally-released version of fiona apple's new album. i think i like the original leaked version better. well, for some of the songs at least. maybe it's just because i was so used to the arrangements on the leaked versions. especially "get him back" and "better version of me"...anyway, it's still good. just different. posted at 1:40 PM |  

found out that another acquaintance from college is getting married this year...*groan*...why is everyone getting married??? enough, already.

i just feel like something's wrong with me because i can't find anyone. not that i have been trying. and i don't even want to get married anytime soon. but i just feel frustrated when i hear about these...well, not-so-good-looking girls (i can say that right? i mean, i'm not friends with her...) who manage to get someone (an indian dude she probably works with). because these girls were losers in college, but just because they work at these places, they are able to find some other loser who wants to marry them! but since i don't work at a place like that, i can't find one for myself (that didn't come out right, but you know what i mean). posted at 7:47 PM |  

a shut-out! yay!

i'm so tired right now though. going to go sleep at my mom's tonight. so i can actually get some sleep. posted at 7:42 PM |  

haven't had much to blog about lately...unless you want to hear more about my RUDE upstairs neighbor and what an asshole he is.

last night was really bad (i finally went to sleep around 5), so if i seem cranky, that's why.

anyway, i have some work to do, and then i'm off to the game. getting a late start this morning...er, afternoon...isn't helping matters. posted at 12:22 PM |